Emily had a busy night. She was running, jumping, and exploring in the darkness. With that excitement now behind her, she has settled in for a morning of rest and relaxation. Applying her ample cognitive abilities to the task at hand, she quickly deduced the perfect place to rest and occupied it with her entire body.
The Ottoman beckoned as an island of comfort in a wasteland of hard wood flooring. Leaping gracefully, she alighted upon its multi-colored surface ready for some serious napping. Having attained her perch, she made herself at home rubbing her face on it and generally hunkering down.
Slow Mo Cat News:
Today Emily was featured as a guest poster on Katzenworld Blog. Check it out here.
Some days only a nap will do. Today, with the early morning sun pouring in, Emily found the lure of sleep irresistible. Not that she usually bothers to fight the impulse to rest, but today offered a rare opportunity for complete serenity. Stretched out in her favorite position on the sofa, Emily let the suns rays wash over her tiny furry body and drifted off into the land of feline dreams.
Since she usually has such a busy schedule of looking at things, sitting places, and eating food, this was a welcome rest for a busy lady. Refreshed after her nap, there is no telling what kind of hijinks she might get up to, but, in the meantime, she slumbers on, a serene cat, captured in slow motion doing what she does best: looking perfect!
When she has a goal in mind, Emily will stop at nothing to achieve it. Today that goal was water. Not just any water, the water in the glass on the table. She has her own water bowl, and she is occasionally caught investigation (aka drinking out of) the faucets in the bathroom, but sometimes forbidden fruit tastes the sweetest. The only obstacle in Emily's path was the shape of the glass itself. With a small opening (full disclosure, it used to be an applesauce container) at the top, and the water juuuust low enough to be out of reach, Emily had to improvise.
Upon closer examination, Emily realized her head would not fit through the opening. Quickly, she devised a way around this obstacle. With the daintiest of movements, she brought her paw up and dipped it into the water. Finding that it was indeed water and delicious, she continued dipping. Like a great ape using a stick to fish for termites, Emily deftly implemented all the formidable tools at her disposal to retrieve the crystalline life-juice (aka water) from the glass. (Yes, we saw her do this before sort of when she was imitating Don Draper, but this is a more sustained effort and that was acting anyway.)
This morning Emily was ready for her closeup. Drawing her inspiration from the stars of old, she poses for the camera showing off her good side (just kidding, both sides are her good side) and putting her best foot forward (also kidding, all of her feet are her best feet). There was some debate about what the setting for this close up should be. Emily was firm that it had to be "comfy" and "soft" so, after a quick scouting trip, the perfect place was found: the couch. Once she had taken up residence on the couch, she quickly made herself comfortable and, within moments, the shoot was complete.
Please with herself and her efforts, Emily immediately curled up for a nap. She almost tried to nap before the shoot, but then thought better of it. For the shoot, she followed her Four Rules for the Perfect Close Up:
1. Look like you are about to take a nap and then be all like "oh, hey, I didn't see you there."
2. Sit up regally from your almost-napping position.
3. Hold that pose, maybe move around a little bit. Do some ear stuff.
4. Done. Perfection achieved, let's take a real nap now.
Many of the moves that have been described in previous posts on My Slow Mo Cat have featured Emily executing complex, difficult maneuvers. Today, we show a simpler, more direct way of dealing with an enemy threat. Emily shows off her prodigious skills as always by flawlessy implementing this strategy, but the truth is this is what a sports writer would call a "high percentage play." One that is most likely to succeed. For your viewing peasure: The-Two-Handed-Snag-and-Bite.
Unlike the One-Handed-Snatch-and-Claw-Grab this move doubles the chances of success by using...BOTH hands. Emily takes the measure of her opponent. She gets an eye on how they are approaching. With expert timing she splays her paws out wide and, at the proper moment, pulls the trigger slamming them together, claws fully extended, trapping her witless prey in between. Then, using her hand-talons for leverage, and the considerable force of her front legs, draws the prey to her and bites down. The end has come for whoever faces her wrath.
Emily demonstrates The-Two-Handed-Snag-and-Bite with The Rainbow Snake:
Emily is a happy, happy kitty. And why shouldn't she be? She gets to nap and snack and play to her hearts content. What's that you say, it's Monday? Well, that is of no concern to a perfect baby kitty like Emily -- she still gets to keep to her regular schedule and enjoy her life to the fullest. Since she was up all last night playing in the dark "living life to the fullest" today has looked a lot like "sleeping in a comfy chair." She will arise later in the day to scamper thither and yon, but for now, she is content to dream on.
Who knows what it is she dreams of, but judging by the look of extreme serenity on her face, I would bet that it is something wonderful. All days are good days, but it is clear that, for Emily at least, this is a happy, happy day.
Mad Men is a show know for its deliberate pacing and slow building seasons. As someone who also likes to take things slow, Emily is a big fan. She has been an avid Mad Men viewer since she first found the series, and the countdown to its finale is not going to be easy. To help distract from the fact that in just five days the last ever new Mad Men episode will air, Emily has decided to celebrate a truncated Mad Men Week, impersonating characters from the now-iconic series.
Emily has saved the man himself for last. Mr. Carousel, the man who exploded, the one with the silver tongue, Don Draper! She broods, she looks at things with great meaning, she contemplates existence, she drinks heavily (jk); Emily was born to play this role just as much as Jon Hamm was. In today's video, she tests the waters (literally) of a different future, staring into the depths of the glass, she looks longingly, cogitating on the deep mysteries of the world and strikes a face that appears to be coming to terms with her deep seeded feelings of inadequacy stemming from a sad, broken childhood. Though sweet Emily has not experienced these things, she embodies them with great aplomb and shows that she has what it takes to be Don Draper.
Mad Men is a show know for its deliberate pacing and slow building seasons. As someone who also likes to take things slow, Emily is a big fan. She has been an avid Mad Men viewer since she first found the series, and the countdown to its finale is not going to be easy. To help distract from the fact that in just five days the last ever new Mad Men episode will air, Emily has decided to celebrate a truncated Mad Men Week, impersonating characters from the now-iconic series.
Roger Sterling is all about having a good time. Of course, since he's a character on Mad Men, he's also haunted by his life choices and riddled with self doubts. In his case, however, unlike many of the other characters featured on the show, he deals with his inner darkness by letting his inner child run wild. Drinking, philandering, and taking LSD with reckless abandon, Roger crashes his way through the 60s careening from party to party with a zippy one-liner always on the tip of his tongue.
Since it is Saturday (and the last day before the last new Mad Men EVER is released) Emily decided that it was a perfect opportunity to pay tribute to Mad Men's resident wild man. She also enjoys a good time and, if catnip is the feline equivalent of the cocktail of chemicals that Roger ingests on a regular basis, then she and he are on the same page because she can't get enough of the stuff. For the fourth installment in our Mad Men commemoration and the prelude to the finale, Emily has a good time like Roger.
Mad Men is a show know for its deliberate pacing and slow building seasons. As someone who also likes to take things slow, Emily is a big fan. She has been an avid Mad Men viewer since she first found the series, and the countdown to its finale is not going to be easy. To help distract from the fact that in just five days the last ever new Mad Men episode will air, Emily has decided to celebrate a truncated Mad Men Week, impersonating characters from the now-iconic series.
For a return to our Fast Friday series, who better for Emily to impersonate from Mad Men than poor Michael Ginsberg. Brilliant, creative, odd, and ultimately very sick. During his run on the series, Ginsberg moved a mile a minute: from one ad idea to the next; his ideas flying off the page and stacking up in folders that were quickly five inches thick. Don is inspired and pushed by him, Peggy is mystified but impressed with his output, and the whole agency benefits from his manic brilliance. Sadly, the introduction of a computer is one step too far for this already fragile mind and whatever latent psychoses Ginsberg has (there are theories) are brought to the surface and take him over. What his co-workers had always treated as his oddities are revealed to be the warning signs of a man with serious mental illness.
Since it seems likely that Ginsberg will not be seen again during the run of Mad Men and that we will hear no more of what is happening to him, we here at My Slow Mo Cat offer our sincere hope that he found the help he needed and returned to some form of creative work; for which he is clearly impeccably suited.
Mad Men is a show know for its deliberate pacing and slow building seasons. As someone who also likes to take things slow, Emily is a big fan. She has been an avid Mad Men viewer since she first found the series, and the countdown to its finale is not going to be easy. To help distract from the fact that in just five days the last ever new Mad Men episode will air, Emily has decided to celebrate a truncated Mad Men Week, impersonating characters from the now-iconic series.
Emily is a savvy dresser, looks great in fur, and knows how to captivate a room just by entering. These are traits she shares with the unflappable office-manager-turned-partner, Joan Holloway (briefly, Harris). For the second day of the Mad Men Finale Countdown here on My Slow Mo Cat, Emily takes on the guise of Joan. Joan is great at her job and a master of interpersonal dynamics (part of what makes her great at her job). If you need to know how to best handle an annoying co-worker, or the perfect place for a delicious semi-formal dinner in the city, Joan is your lady. Confident, judgmental, set in her ways, with a biting tongue, obvious wit, and oodles of self-assurance, Joan is a force to be reckoned with. All that, and she plays the accordion too!
Emily prepares for a night on the town a la Joan Holloway:
Mad Men is a show know for its deliberate pacing and slow building seasons. As someone who also likes to take things slow, Emily is a big fan. She has been an avid Mad Men viewer since she first found the series, and the countdown to its finale is not going to be easy. To help distract from the fact that in just five days the last ever new Mad Men episode will air, Emily has decided to celebrate a truncated Mad Men Week, impersonating characters from the now-iconic series.
To begin, she takes on the character who has undergone the most change: Peggy Olson. Starting with her first day as a secretary at Sterling Cooper, and ending (probably, we don't know for sure) with her ascension through the ranks to a copy writer/copy chief position at one of the largest advertising agencies in the world. Two weeks ago, one of Peggy's iconic moments was her arrival at McCann-Erickson. Wearing sunglasses with a cigarette hanging from her mouth, she looks every inch the woman we were all rooting for her to become. Emily captures that same ruthless energy and I-don't-give-a-****-what-you-think-about-me attitude in her reenactment.
Why just yawn when you can yawn and start getting washed up for the day? This is the question that Emily asked herself this morning. The answer she arrived at? There is no good reason to just yawn. Consummate innovator that she is, she combined her morning yawn with her regular ablutions to result in a revolutionary wake-up-and-get-ready-for-the-day-maneuver: The-Panorama-Yawn-and-Cleaning-Maneuver.
To accomplish The-Panorama-Yawn-and-Cleaning-Maneuver Emily goes through a few easy steps, listed below. Our reporter on the ground was lucky to capture this first iteration of this maneuver; one that is sure to soon be sweeping the nation.
How to Accomplish The-Panorama-Yawn-and-Cleaning-Maneuver:
1. Wake up. It's harder than it sounds.
2. Begin the Yawn Launch Process. This has been detailed in previous posts, but it is very important to execute the yawn part of this endeavor properly because it is the awakening foundation on which this day preparing building of maneuver is built.
3. Harness the Lip Lick. At the end of every yawn, there is a lip lick. The-Panorama-Yawn-and-Cleaning-Maneuver harnesses that movement and mobilizes it to begin cleaning the rest of the body. This is where it really takes off.
Emily continues her informative series "101" (click here for box defense and cleanliness tips) with this useful how to on defending a couch. There are many threats to couch supremacy, all of which can be dismissed with judicial application of the following technique: The Wait and Pounce.
Why wait, you ask? Well, any threat to a couch has to be properly assessed before the response can be effectively devised and implemented. Emily usually waits until the last possible second to spring into action. This not only gives her enough time to respond to the threat properly, but also allows her to catch the threat unawares. Most often, the threat to her couch dominion is from The Rainbow Snake. Here, Emily knows she has the high ground so, she waits and watches as TRS wriggles his dastardly way across the couch. Then, just as TRS is about to escape to freedom, SHE POUNCES! Ba-bammo! Nothing TRS can do to escape! Emily aka professor Slow Mo Cat takes TRS down once again. A victory for Emily!
Emily is not an overly sentimental creature. She rarely gets overly enthused for human holidays. Mother's Day is no exception. However, this year, she did some digging. Historical digging. Context-minded being that she is, she wanted to know where the idea of Mother's Day came from. What she dug up is pretty interesting.
Emily's first discovery was that, not too surprisingly, the movement to make Mother's Day a national holiday was the work of a woman: Anna Marie Jarvis (1864-1948). Jarvis wanted a day that commemorated the "matchless service" of mothers. She was inspired originally by thinking about the thankless work that women did around the country and, after her own mother's passing, she organized events to make Mother's Day official. Mothers' Day, as we now know it, was first celebrated in 1908. Thanks to Jarvis' tireless efforts, in 1914, Woodrow Wilson declared Mother's Day a national holiday. All of this continued the work of Anna Jarvis' mother, Ann Jarvis who, after the Civil War, created a day for the reunion of families split up during the war.
Emily's further investigations revealed that before Anna Marie Jarvis, however, the seeds of a "Mother's Day" were planted years earlier. Before 1908 there were observances of "Mothers' Day"-- the apostrophe moved one space to the right to indicate that it was a day that belonged to mothers not a day that was about them -- had been held. These earlier celebrations were organized by the feminists of the late 19th century and involved political issues such as temperance and anti-war protesting. In 1872, Julia Ward Howe organized a "Mothers' Day of Celebration." The day and its associated proclamation "Appeal to Womanhood Throughout the World" were created to give women a political voice at a time when meaningful political engagement was considered unladylike. The Mothers' Day of Celebration gave women a platform to voice their opinions about the bloodshed they had so recently seen in the American Civil War. Ironically enough, the contemporary Mother's Day was made a holiday in 1914, on the brink of World War I. The contemporary celebration of Mother's Day comes more from the efforts of Anna Marie Jarvis than Julia Ward Howe, however, it is important not to lose sight of where this holiday originated: with strong women who wanted to amplify the voice of those who could not be heard, and who were not often enough officially recognized for their contributions to the home, the nation, and the world.
Appeal to Womanhood Throughout the World
Julia Ward Howe
Again, in the sight of the Christian world, have the skill and power of two great nations exhausted themselves in mutual murder. Again have the sacred questions of international justice been committed to the fatal mediation of military weapons. In this day of progress, in this century of light, the ambition of rulers has been allowed to barter the dear interests of domestic life for the bloody exchanges of the battle field. Thus men have done. Thus men will do. But women need no longer be made a party to proceedings which fill the globe with grief and horror. Despite the assumptions of physical force, the mother has a sacred and commanding word to say to the sons who owe their life to her suffering. That word should now be heard, and answered to as never before.
Arise, then, Christian women of this day! Arise, all women who have hearts, Whether your baptism be that of water or of tears! Say firmly : We will not have great questions decided by irrelevant agencies. Our husbands shall not come to us, reeking with carnage, for caresses and applause. Our sons shall not be taken from us to unlearn all that we have been able to teach them of charity, mercy and patience. We, women of one country, will be too tender of those of another country, to allow our sons to be trained to injure theirs. From the bosom of the devastated earth a voice goes up with our own. It says: Disarm, disarm! The sword of murder is not the balance of justice. Blood does not wipe out dishonor, nor violence vindicate possession. As men have often forsaken the plough and the anvil at the summons of war, let women now leave all that may be left of home for a great and earnest day of council.
Let them meet first, as women, to bewail and commemorate the dead. Let them then solemnly take council with each other as to the means whereby the great human family can live in peace, man as the brother of man, each bearing after his own kind the sacred impress, not of Caesar, but of God.
In the name of womanhood and of humanity, I earnestly ask that a general congress of women, without limit of nationality, may be appointed and held at some place deemed most convenient, and at the earliest period consistent with its objects, to promote the alliance of the different nationalities, the amicable settlement of international questions, the great and general interests of peace.
Emily displays her independence in a battle with the Rainbow Snake:
Weekends are a great time to rest. Emily verges on the territory of "professional rester." She can sleep almost anywhere, though soft and fluffy places are vastly preferred. She can also rest at anytime of the day or night. Emily has been discovered sleeping on chairs at midday, on couches in the middle of the night, and in boxes in the evening. Emily claims not to need any beauty rest making statements like, "I was born this perfect" or "I don't ned to rest to be beautiful, I need to rest so I can be awake later" or "I only sleep when I'm tired, what do you mean beauty rest do you think I'm not already the most beautiful!?!" She has many thoughts on the matter. And it is true, her rest is more about taking some well deserved time for herself after busy stretches of time engaging in energetic feline activities such as "Chasing The Rainbow Snake" or "Running Places." ON the weekends, however, her duties are not as intense and Emily has more time to rest and relax.
When Emily lays her head down, it is serious business. She will often wrap a foot around her face, or her tail around her entire body to ensure that no warmth can escape. She will also almost always find the softest, coziest, warmest spot she can; even if this means curling up in the place certain humans were just sitting. Mischief and careful planning go into every nap time adventure. Today, Emily is a Sleepy Slow Mo Cat!
Of her many talents, the Regal Statuesque Rest Pose, is one of her greatest. With a mere turn of the head and angling of her body she can strike a sphinx-like pose that radiates ancient glory and poised grace. This morning, without even trying, she was in such a position. Taking her spot on the couch, she transformed it into a throne, one made for a cat-queen.
Sitting in state, hearing the plight of her subjects, she reigns supreme. Swept to power on a wave of popular support, she is commonly referred to as the most beautiful ruler in the history of the couch. The thrilling tale of her conquest can be read here. She has remained in power due to her just hand, her commander's mind, and her thoughtful lawmaking. She has preserved peace in her realm and presided over a prosperous time in the kingdom. Long live the queen!!!
When you go on as many adventures as Emily does, you get dirty. It's just a fact. As a result, it is important to make the time to clean up. This is something Emily does every day. Whether on a couch, a chair, an ottoman, or the middle of the floor in the spot where someone was about to walk, she'll make the time to keep herself pristine.
The paws are usually first since they have usually traveled the roughest. Then her sides and back, then her tail. This routine then finishes with a once-over of her head ears and, last but not least, as featured yesterday, her whiskers. These ablutions keep Emily in tip-top shape, ready for whatever challenges the day may pose, and whatever adventures lie in the next mile on the road of life.
Emily has found many creative answers to the question, "What time is it!?!" When asked she is as likely to respond, "Time for you to get a watch." as she is, "11:23am." Today, when asked she had one resounding answer: Whisker Time! Feeling her oats and full of fight, Emily was in the mood to display her face-hairs in the early morning light. Stretching her lip muscles and flexing her eyebrows, her whiskers were extended to their full length. An impressive sight indeed.
Emily takes good care of her vibrissae (aka whiskers -- Emily likes the official terms because they are, as she says, "more imposing."), cleaning and preening, not out of vanity, but out of necessity. As the apex predator in her environment she has to maintain all of the tools at her disposal for hunting down and catching intruders. Since she has to put her mystacial vibrissae (aka, lip whiskers -- Emily insists on the latin because it is, "more important sounding and befits my regal bearing.") to work regularly when tracking her prey, she will often pay extra attention to keeping them clean. While she would not answer specific questions about how exactly her vibrissae work, they clearly aid in her predatory endeavors and, the look pretty darn fantastic too!
There are many ways to greet the day. Today, Emily did so with a primordial roar that echoed throughout her domain. Lion-like in its intensity and tiger-like in its power, her roar resounded bouncing off of walls, tables, and countertops alike. The ferocity and power of this explosion of feline energy was matched only by the grace with which she executed the roar itself; stretching her head back and opening her mouth wide.
While other were sleeping in and lollygagging about, Emily was doing her cat-business. There is nothing like an early morning roar to help prepare for breakfast, assorted playing/running/looking at things activities, and any and all other adventures that lay in store for a frisky feline. Though she does not roar often, she does so well, which is why today we feature Emily's Slow Mo ROAR!!!
Emily has never been a big eater. She always has her fill, but does not want to feel overstuffed. She snacks throughout the day and when mealtimes come, she is ready to dig in. Being too full has its dangers. If she is sated and drowsy, any miscreant might sneak up and catch her unawares. To ensure that this never happens, Emily has enough to be full and never more.
Today, after patiently waiting for her breakfast, Emily dug in with gusto. Her unsuspecting pate-prey trapped in its bowl was no match for her fang-filled assault. Snapping and gnashing she quickly demolished it and crowned herself Queen of Breakfast, Ruler of the Four Food Groups, and Protector of all Things Culinary. She rules still with none to threaten her crown.
Under the cover of darkness, Emily launched an investigation. She had discovered something strange on her table and, curious cat that she is, she immediately began to find out all she could. First using her paws and then involving her jaws, she batted and clawed at the odd metallic objects, only to discover they were...keys!
Using the shadows and the dark to disguise her movements, Emily continued to play with them. Her ability to blend in to the darkness, even with her bright fur, is commendable. Trained in stealth and secrecy, Emily knows how to silently stalk the edges of night. The darkness was so complete that our camera could barely capture her in the act. Rest assured, once she found them, the keys didn't have a chance. When the Slow Mo Cat is on the case, there is nowhere to run and nowhere to hide.
Spring has sprung! At long last, Emily can yet again bask in the warming glow of the sun. This morning she takes up a perch on the window sill where she can not only enjoy the warm rays, but also keep a close eye on the goings on outside. One of Emily's main criteria in choosing a perch has to do with how much she can see from where she sets up shop. In this case, there are three reasons the windowsill is perfect.
1. Sun. It is warm when the sun shines in. Always appreciative of natural warmth (though not hot springs because they are made of water, obviously) Emily relishes the opportunity to soak up some rays.
2. Proximity to the Outdoors. Though she herself no longer ventures into the great outdoors, her love of the natural world and the obvious joy she gets from the gusts of wind that come in through the window have not diminished.
3. Monitoring. From the windowsill, Emily can see and hear all while remaining almost invisible behind the screen. Like a secret agent she prowls, viewing and noting the goings on for future reference. What's not to love!
Also, as if there needed to be another reason, Emily looks great in the sun. It makes her fur sparkle and her face shine.
Emily is known by many names. Today she added a new one to the list: "Comfy Kitty." As she rested in the sun this morning, she attained this title by achieving a level of relaxation and contentment rarely seen. Even whens he raised her head to yawn, she was clearly still a bundle of relaxation.
How did she achieve this? It is all down to The Blue Blanket. A fuzzy concoction equal parts wool and cloud, it forms the perfect warm, but not stifling, snuggly, but not stifling surface for Emily to stretch out on. With the help of The Blue Blanket, she can attain heights of rest and relaxation only dreamed of by past generations.
