Oh Hey! I Didn't See You There.

Emily is rarely surprised. While deep in sleep the other day, she was startled to find someone LOOKING at her! Did she react in a panic? Jump up and run away. Yowl and cry? No. She handled it with her typical aplomb, gazing calmly back at the camera wearing a lightly quizzical expression. After the incident, I interviewed Emily about how she managed to quell her basic feline instincts and present such a dignified front. She gave me the exclusive details on her 5 step method.

1. Hearing/feeling something you did not expect.
This is how it always begins. Something you didn't think was going to happen is happening and OH MY GOD IT IS RIGHT NEXT TO YOU!!! This is the event that starts it all. If you do not immediately feel something touching you, then you can roll with it. If something is touching you, you can skip the next four steps and just go to straight freak out mode. Claws and all. If nothing is touching you then...

2. Investigate what is happening.
Great, nothing is touching you. Win one for you. Now whatever is happening that you did not expect is likely going on behind you. Now is the time for you to turn and use your eye-skills to ascertain what, precisely, is going on. If what is going on is a yelling person or something threatening looking, you can skip the next three steps and go to straight freak out mode. Claws and all. If it is not a yelling person or something threatening looking then...

3. Look at it a lot.
Hooray! No one is yelling at you and nothing is threatening you. This day just keeps getting better. (An essential part of this whole process is maintaining a positive attitude -- celebrate the mini-victories along the way and your calm demeanor will only be reinforced.) Since whatever surprised you is not a bad thing, you can now just look at it a lot until you figure out what it is. If you figure out what it is and that thing that it is is something bad -- you know the drill. You can skip the next two steps and just go totally bonkers at it. If it is not a bad thing then...

4. Keep looking at it a lot.
Sometimes not bad things are hard to figure out, especially if you just woke up. Is it a friend coming by for an unexpected visit? Any and all of these things are possible, but it will take a lot of looking to figure that out.  If it is a nefarious hidden bad thing masquerading as a good thing (this does sometimes happen) and it took this much looking to understand that, skip the next step and JUST GO NUTS!!!

5. Go back to what you were doing.
Yes, you have figured out that you are in no danger and that whatever startled you was just a mild interruption to your already scheduled plans. You can return to them content in the knowledge that you have kept your composure while assessing your surroundings. You are a hero! Reward yourself by doing whatever it was you were doing before you stopped doing that thing to look at the surprising event.

Thanks for that advice Emily! Now, to see her put this into action, check out the video below:

The Rescue Roger Story

It was a summer evening like any other. A group of friends walking back from getting ice cream talking about life, the universe and everything. As they get ready to cross the busy street in front of the ice cream parlor, something darts down the sidewalk. Fast, small, furry, it is hard to tell at first if it is a squirrel or an opossum. Then suddenly, realization dawns: it is a kitten. Scared and alone, he runs and runs back and forth closer and closer to the traffic.

---------------------

That is how Roger first came into our lives. Lucky for him, one of the people in that group of friends knew what she had to do. She reached out to him. He ran to her and the rest is history. After knocking on doors and asking everyone in the area if they knew where he came from, and receiving blank stares and "I don't knows," she knew she couldn't leave him on the street. Squirmy though he was, she was able to get him back home. He had on a dingy collar. It was hard to tell if it had always been as grey as it was now. The collar gave us hope -- maybe there was someone, somewhere out there who was looking for him. Posters were made, notices put out on social media. All greeted with ringing silence. He was frisky, in all honesty bordering on the annoying, but with the sweetest face and, when not in full-on over excited kitten mode, he was a cuddly baby boy who just wanted to snuggle close. Not wanting to put Emily at risk, he lived happily in the bathroom -- he was so tiny, this was more than enough space -- until he had been fully checked by a vet. After that there was just the challenge of introducing a hyperactive kitten to a 15 year old feline used to the cushy life of an only cat.

For a long time we resisted naming him. Then, when it became clear that no one was coming for him, the conversation about a fitting moniker began in ernest. Lists were made, silly suggestions came and went, and finally, after polling friends and relatives, he became Roger. He is hyperactive, ever growing, and learning new tricks every day. He has come a long way from the small, scared, hungry kitten about to dart into traffic. Roger's story has a happy ending, but, sadly, there are many more cats who do not find a home so easily.

More updates about Roger's and Emily's life will be here as always!

Make sure to visit the My Slow Mo Cat Store. Proceeds benefit the Exotic Feline Rescue Center. Store: http://www.zazzle.com/myslowmocat 

Roger cleans his paws, tongue flapping:

Sweet Emily Sleeps

Emily has been hard at work. With the new Slow Mo Cat fundraising project in full swing and a busy schedule of being cute, having her picture taken, and playing with toys, she needs to find lots of time to rest. The addition of new kitty, Roger to her life has also made for more excitement than usual. Emily, champion of feline grace and attitude that she is, has still found plenty of time for her favored activities, chief among them, sleep.

As evidenced in the video below, even the presence of the camera cannot disturb her slumbers.

My Slow Mo Cat Store has new products every day so be sure to check it out and remember, half of all proceeds from now to the end of the year go to the Exotic Feline Rescue Center!

Slow Mo Cat Store: http://www.zazzle.com/myslowmocat

Emily in Repose:

BIG NEWS and Unstoppable Cuteness

News First! Today is Cyber Monday. This is not usually an occasion for much celebration, unless you just got an amazing deal. Emily set out to change that. With her innovator's brain and champion's heart she struck out on her own path. Yes, there is now a MySlowMoCat store! But this is no ordinary store, no, it is a store with a mission. This store is dedicated to everything that Emily is dedicated to: helping cats, supporting the humans who help cats, and (to paraphrase Martin Luther King) generally bending the arc of the moral universe towards justice. To this end, half of all proceeds from the MySlowMoCat store between today and the end of this year will go to support the Exotic Feline Rescue Center.

Emily, ever the dreamer, has set the goal of making a $10,000 donation to the EFRC on January 1, but that can only happen with your help. If you love cats, if you know anyone who loves cats, this is your chance to not only indulge in the purchasing of some premium cat paraphernalia, but also to support a wonderful organization, doing important work with cats in need. Products will be added to the store willy-nilly, left and right all week. If by the end of the week we do not have something that you are looking for, just write in to myslowmocat@gmail.com and, if it is possibly, we will make it a reality.

Make sure to check in here for more information about how the fundraiser is going, and for announcements of new products.

To visit the store just go here: www.zazzle.com/myslowmocat

If you thought this project would keep Emily from her regularly scheduled activities of resting, cleaning her tail, and being perfect, you would be incorrect! Nothing can keep that magical lady from her preferred pastimes as evidenced by the video below:

Emily the Queen of the Sun (10/24/15)

A cross country trip has not hindered Emily's ability to light up a room with her very presence, or the heart-melting quality of her visage. After a few weeks away from regular updates, weekly posting shall resume. Emily, grudgingly, has let into her life a new companion: Roger. He is small, he is feisty, he is frisky, he is a tiny baby man kitten and he too will feature on My Slow Mo Cat.


Gifted as he is with excess amounts of energy, an outsized personality, and a creative idea of what constitutes "personal space" Emily is yet to warm to this intruder, however, she still knows how to command a sunbeam. In the presence of another cat, she has crowned herself the undisputed Queen of the Sun, Sole Possessor of Beams, and Primary Inhabitant of All Places Blessed by the Rays of Our Nearest Star. Emily takes the role of Sun Queen very seriously and, as today's video shows, she is not about to let anyone be as sweet, cute, or comfortable as she is in the sun's fading rays. Roger for his part accepts her position and, as Sun Prince, awaits the day when he too can be an elegant ruler. For now, he is content to be a second in command, there is more than enough sunlight to go around.

Emily in full Sun Queen mode:

100 DAYS OF SLOW MO CAT!!!

Well, technically it was 99 days. But today is the 100th! After 99 straight days of videos, photos, and posts, Emily needed a break. She is rested, refreshed, and ready to return to the internet. Her posts will go up once a week on Saturdays now, but they will always be there.

In her time away from the web, Emily has been up to all her old tricks: battling her nemesis The Rainbow Snake, fighting for supremacy over all mealtimes and furniture, eviscerating poachers in her guise as The Dark Hunter, and engaging in thrilling Inter(cat)ional Relations, negotiating with her tail. All this and more will be on display in the weeks to come. We also will have a special announcement next week about an exciting development in Slow Mo Cat Land. For now, enjoy this video of Emily playing with her newest toy.

Reminder, Emily is on Twitter and Facebook so make sure to check her out there too!

Emily celebrates her full return to the internet by playing with a favorite new toy:

Comfy Cozy Slow Mo Cat (5/23/15)

Emily had a busy night. She was running, jumping, and exploring in the darkness. With that excitement now behind her, she has settled in for a morning of rest and relaxation. Applying her ample cognitive abilities to the task at hand, she quickly deduced the perfect place to rest and occupied it with her entire body.

The Ottoman  beckoned as an island of comfort in a wasteland of hard wood flooring. Leaping gracefully, she alighted upon its multi-colored surface ready for some serious napping. Having attained her perch, she made herself at home rubbing her face on it and generally hunkering down.

Slow Mo Cat News:

Today Emily was featured as a guest poster on Katzenworld Blog. Check it out here.

Comfy Cozy Kitty:

Serene Slow Mo Cat (5/22/15)

Some days only a nap will do. Today, with the early morning sun pouring in, Emily found the lure of sleep irresistible. Not that she usually bothers to fight the impulse to rest, but today offered a rare opportunity for complete serenity. Stretched out in her favorite position on the sofa, Emily let the suns rays wash over her tiny furry body and drifted off into the land of feline dreams.

Since she usually has such a busy schedule of looking at things, sitting places, and eating food, this was a welcome rest for a busy lady. Refreshed after her nap, there is no telling what kind of hijinks she might get up to, but, in the meantime, she slumbers on, a serene cat, captured in slow motion doing what she does best: looking perfect!

Video:

Sneaky Slow Mo Cat (5/21/15)

When she has a goal in mind, Emily will stop at nothing to achieve it. Today that goal was water. Not just any water, the water in the glass on the table. She has her own water bowl, and she is occasionally caught investigation (aka drinking out of) the faucets in the bathroom, but sometimes forbidden fruit tastes the sweetest. The only obstacle in Emily's path was the shape of the glass itself. With a small opening (full disclosure, it used to be an applesauce container) at the top, and the water juuuust low enough to be out of reach, Emily had to improvise.

Upon closer examination, Emily realized her head would not fit through the opening. Quickly, she devised a way around this obstacle. With the daintiest of movements, she brought her paw up and dipped it into the water. Finding that it was indeed water and delicious, she continued dipping. Like a great ape using a stick to fish for termites, Emily deftly implemented all the formidable tools at her disposal to retrieve the crystalline life-juice (aka water) from the glass. (Yes, we saw her do this before sort of when she was imitating Don Draper, but this is a more sustained effort and that was acting anyway.)

Emily achieves her goals:

Up Close and Personal! (5/20/15)

This morning Emily was ready for her closeup. Drawing her inspiration from the stars of old, she poses for the camera showing off her good side (just kidding, both sides are her good side) and putting her best foot forward (also kidding, all of her feet are her best feet). There was some debate about what the setting for this close up should be. Emily was firm that it had to be "comfy" and "soft" so, after a quick scouting trip, the perfect place was found: the couch. Once she had taken up residence on the couch, she quickly made herself comfortable and, within moments, the shoot was complete.

Please with herself and her efforts, Emily immediately curled up for a nap. She almost tried to nap before the shoot, but then thought better of it. For the shoot, she followed her Four Rules for the Perfect Close Up:

1. Look like you are about to take a nap and then be all like "oh, hey, I didn't see you there."

2. Sit up regally from your almost-napping position.

3. Hold that pose, maybe move around a little bit. Do some ear stuff.

4. Done. Perfection achieved, let's take a real nap now.

The Close Up:

The-Two-Handed-Snag-and-Bite (5/19/15)

Many of the moves that have been described in previous posts on My Slow Mo Cat have featured Emily executing complex, difficult maneuvers. Today, we show a simpler, more direct way of dealing with an enemy threat. Emily shows off her prodigious skills as always by flawlessy implementing this strategy, but the truth is this is what a sports writer would call a "high percentage play." One that is most likely to succeed. For your viewing peasure: The-Two-Handed-Snag-and-Bite.

Unlike the One-Handed-Snatch-and-Claw-Grab this move doubles the chances of success by using...BOTH hands. Emily takes the measure of her opponent. She gets an eye on how they are approaching. With expert timing she splays her paws out wide and, at the proper moment, pulls the trigger slamming them together, claws fully extended, trapping her witless prey in between. Then, using her hand-talons for leverage, and the considerable force of her front legs, draws the prey to her and bites down. The end has come for whoever faces her wrath.

Emily demonstrates The-Two-Handed-Snag-and-Bite with The Rainbow Snake:

A Happy Happy Day (5/18/15)

Emily is a happy, happy kitty. And why shouldn't she be? She gets to nap and snack and play to her hearts content. What's that you say, it's Monday? Well, that is of no concern to a perfect baby kitty like Emily -- she still gets to keep to her regular schedule and enjoy her life to the fullest. Since she was up all last night playing in the dark "living life to the fullest" today has looked a lot like "sleeping in a comfy chair." She will arise later in the day to scamper thither and yon, but for now, she is content to dream on.

Who knows what it is she dreams of, but judging by the look of extreme serenity on her face, I would bet that it is something wonderful. All days are good days, but it is clear that, for Emily at least, this is a happy, happy day.

Video:

DON DRAPER KITTY!!! (5/17/15)

Mad Men is a show know for its deliberate pacing and slow building seasons. As someone who also likes to take things slow, Emily is a big fan. She has been an avid Mad Men viewer since she first found the series, and the countdown to its finale is not going to be easy. To help distract from the fact that in just five days the last ever new Mad Men episode will air, Emily has decided to celebrate a truncated Mad Men Week, impersonating characters from the now-iconic series.

Countdown 1: Peggy Olson
Countdown 2: Joan Holloway
Countdown 3: Michael Ginsberg
Countdown 4: Roger Sterling

Emily has saved the man himself for last. Mr. Carousel, the man who exploded, the one with the silver tongue, Don Draper! She broods, she looks at things with great meaning, she contemplates existence, she drinks heavily (jk); Emily was born to play this role just as much as Jon Hamm was. In today's video, she tests the waters (literally) of a different future, staring into the depths of the glass, she looks longingly, cogitating on the deep mysteries of the world and strikes a face that appears to be coming to terms with her deep seeded feelings of inadequacy stemming from a sad, broken childhood. Though sweet Emily has not experienced these things, she embodies them with great aplomb and shows that she has what it takes to be Don Draper.

Video:

Roger Sterling Kitty (5/16/15)

Mad Men is a show know for its deliberate pacing and slow building seasons. As someone who also likes to take things slow, Emily is a big fan. She has been an avid Mad Men viewer since she first found the series, and the countdown to its finale is not going to be easy. To help distract from the fact that in just five days the last ever new Mad Men episode will air, Emily has decided to celebrate a truncated Mad Men Week, impersonating characters from the now-iconic series.

Countdown 1: Peggy Olson
Countdown 2: Joan Holloway
Countdown 3: Michael Ginsberg

Roger Sterling is all about having a good time. Of course, since he's a character on Mad Men, he's also haunted by his life choices and riddled with self doubts. In his case, however, unlike many of the other characters featured on the show, he deals with his inner darkness by letting his inner child run wild. Drinking, philandering, and taking LSD with reckless abandon, Roger crashes his way through the 60s careening from party to party with a zippy one-liner always on the tip of his tongue.

Since it is Saturday (and the last day before the last new Mad Men EVER is released) Emily decided that it was a perfect opportunity to pay tribute to Mad Men's resident wild man. She also enjoys a good time and, if catnip is the feline equivalent of the cocktail of chemicals that Roger ingests on a regular basis, then she and he are on the same page because she can't get enough of the stuff. For the fourth installment in our Mad Men commemoration and the prelude to the finale, Emily has a good time like Roger.

Emily partying down:

Fast Friday 9: Speeding Like Ginsberg (5/15/15)

Mad Men is a show know for its deliberate pacing and slow building seasons. As someone who also likes to take things slow, Emily is a big fan. She has been an avid Mad Men viewer since she first found the series, and the countdown to its finale is not going to be easy. To help distract from the fact that in just five days the last ever new Mad Men episode will air, Emily has decided to celebrate a truncated Mad Men Week, impersonating characters from the now-iconic series.

Countdown 1: Peggy Olson
Countdown 2: Joan Holloway

For a return to our Fast Friday series, who better for Emily to impersonate from Mad Men than poor Michael Ginsberg. Brilliant, creative, odd, and ultimately very sick. During his run on the series, Ginsberg moved a mile a minute: from one ad idea to the next; his ideas flying off the page and stacking up in folders that were quickly five inches thick. Don is inspired and pushed by him, Peggy is mystified but impressed with his output, and the whole agency benefits from his manic brilliance. Sadly, the introduction of a computer is one step too far for this already fragile mind and whatever latent psychoses Ginsberg has (there are theories) are brought to the surface and take him over. What his co-workers had always treated as his oddities are revealed to be the warning signs of a man with serious mental illness.

Since it seems likely that Ginsberg will not be seen again during the run of Mad Men and that we will hear no more of what is happening to him, we here at My Slow Mo Cat offer our sincere hope that he found the help he needed and returned to some form of creative work; for which he is clearly impeccably suited.

Emily Paying Tribute to Ginsberg:

Mad Men Countdown 2: Joan Holloway (5/14/15)

Mad Men is a show know for its deliberate pacing and slow building seasons. As someone who also likes to take things slow, Emily is a big fan. She has been an avid Mad Men viewer since she first found the series, and the countdown to its finale is not going to be easy. To help distract from the fact that in just five days the last ever new Mad Men episode will air, Emily has decided to celebrate a truncated Mad Men Week, impersonating characters from the now-iconic series.

Countdown 1: Peggy Olson

Emily is a savvy dresser, looks great in fur, and knows how to captivate a room just by entering. These are traits she shares with the unflappable office-manager-turned-partner, Joan Holloway (briefly, Harris). For the second day of the Mad Men Finale Countdown here on My Slow Mo Cat, Emily takes on the guise of Joan. Joan is great at her job and a master of interpersonal dynamics (part of what makes her great at her job). If you need to know how to best handle an annoying co-worker, or the perfect place for a delicious semi-formal dinner in the city, Joan is your lady. Confident, judgmental, set in her ways, with a biting tongue, obvious wit, and oodles of self-assurance, Joan is a force to be reckoned with. All that, and she plays the accordion too!

Emily prepares for a night on the town a la Joan Holloway:

Mad Men Countdown 1: Peggy Olson (5/13/15)

Mad Men is a show know for its deliberate pacing and slow building seasons. As someone who also likes to take things slow, Emily is a big fan. She has been an avid Mad Men viewer since she first found the series, and the countdown to its finale is not going to be easy. To help distract from the fact that in just five days the last ever new Mad Men episode will air, Emily has decided to celebrate a truncated Mad Men Week, impersonating characters from the now-iconic series.

To begin, she takes on the character who has undergone the most change: Peggy Olson. Starting with her first day as a secretary at Sterling Cooper, and ending (probably, we don't know for sure) with her ascension through the ranks to a copy writer/copy chief position at one of the largest advertising agencies in the world. Two weeks ago, one of Peggy's iconic moments was her arrival at McCann-Erickson. Wearing sunglasses with a cigarette hanging from her mouth, she looks every inch the woman we were all rooting for her to become. Emily captures that same ruthless energy and I-don't-give-a-****-what-you-think-about-me attitude in her reenactment.

Emily Does the Peggy:

The-Panorama-Yawn-and-Cleaning-Maneuver (5/12/15)

Why just yawn when you can yawn and start getting washed up for the day? This is the question that Emily asked herself this morning. The answer she arrived at? There is no good reason to just yawn. Consummate innovator that she is, she combined her morning yawn with her regular ablutions to result in a revolutionary wake-up-and-get-ready-for-the-day-maneuver: The-Panorama-Yawn-and-Cleaning-Maneuver.

To accomplish The-Panorama-Yawn-and-Cleaning-Maneuver Emily goes through a few easy steps, listed below. Our reporter on the ground was lucky to capture this first iteration of this maneuver; one that is sure to soon be sweeping the nation.

How to Accomplish The-Panorama-Yawn-and-Cleaning-Maneuver:

1. Wake up. It's harder than it sounds.

2. Begin the Yawn Launch Process. This has been detailed in previous posts, but it is very important to execute the yawn part of this endeavor properly because it is the awakening foundation on which this day preparing building of maneuver is built.

3. Harness the Lip Lick. At the end of every yawn, there is a lip lick. The-Panorama-Yawn-and-Cleaning-Maneuver harnesses that movement and mobilizes it to begin cleaning the rest of the body. This is where it really takes off.

Emily flawlessly executing The-Panorama-Yawn-and-Cleaning-Maneuver:

Couch Defense 101 with Professor Slow Mo Cat (5/11/15)

Emily continues her informative series "101" (click here for box defense and cleanliness tips) with this useful how to on defending a couch. There are many threats to couch supremacy, all of which can be dismissed with judicial application of the following technique: The Wait and Pounce.

Why wait, you ask? Well, any threat to a couch has to be properly assessed before the response can be effectively devised and implemented. Emily usually waits until the last possible second to spring into action. This not only gives her enough time to respond to the threat properly, but also allows her to catch the threat unawares. Most often, the threat to her couch dominion is from The Rainbow Snake. Here, Emily knows she has the high ground so, she waits and watches as TRS wriggles his dastardly way across the couch. Then, just as TRS is about to escape to freedom, SHE POUNCES! Ba-bammo! Nothing TRS can do to escape! Emily aka professor Slow Mo Cat takes TRS down once again. A victory for Emily!

Emily demonstrates the Wait and Pounce:

Mother's Day the Slow Mo Cat Way (5/10/15)

EMILY INVESTIGATES MOTHER'S DAY!!!

Emily is not an overly sentimental creature. She rarely gets overly enthused for human holidays. Mother's Day is no exception. However, this year, she did some digging. Historical digging. Context-minded being that she is, she wanted to know where the idea of Mother's Day came from. What she dug up is pretty interesting.

Emily's first discovery was that, not too surprisingly, the movement to make Mother's Day a national holiday was the work of a woman: Anna Marie Jarvis (1864-1948). Jarvis wanted a day that commemorated the "matchless service" of mothers. She was inspired originally by thinking about the thankless work that women did around the country and, after her own mother's passing, she organized events to make Mother's Day official. Mothers' Day, as we now know it, was first celebrated in 1908. Thanks to Jarvis' tireless efforts, in 1914, Woodrow Wilson declared Mother's Day a national holiday. All of this continued the work of Anna Jarvis' mother, Ann Jarvis who, after the Civil War, created a day for the reunion of families split up during the war.

Emily's further investigations revealed that before Anna Marie Jarvis, however, the seeds of a "Mother's Day" were planted years earlier. Before 1908 there were observances of "Mothers' Day"-- the apostrophe moved one space to the right to indicate that it was a day that belonged to mothers not a day that was about them -- had been held. These earlier celebrations were organized by the feminists of the late 19th century and involved political issues such as temperance and anti-war protesting. In 1872, Julia Ward Howe organized a "Mothers' Day of Celebration." The day and its associated proclamation "Appeal to Womanhood Throughout the World" were created to give women a political voice at a time when meaningful political engagement was considered unladylike. The Mothers' Day of Celebration gave women a platform to voice their opinions about the bloodshed they had so recently seen in the American Civil War. Ironically enough, the contemporary Mother's Day was made a holiday in 1914, on the brink of World War I.  The contemporary celebration of Mother's Day comes more from the efforts of Anna Marie Jarvis than Julia Ward Howe, however, it is important not to lose sight of where this holiday originated: with strong women who wanted to amplify the voice of those who could not be heard, and who were not often enough officially recognized for their contributions to the home, the nation, and the world.

Appeal to Womanhood Throughout the World

Julia Ward Howe

Again, in the sight of the Christian world, have the skill and power of two great nations exhausted themselves in mutual murder. Again have the sacred questions of international justice been committed to the fatal mediation of military weapons. In this day of progress, in this century of light, the ambition of rulers has been allowed to barter the dear interests of domestic life for the bloody exchanges of the battle field. Thus men have done. Thus men will do. But women need no longer be made a party to proceedings which fill the globe with grief and horror. Despite the assumptions of physical force, the mother has a sacred and commanding word to say to the sons who owe their life to her suffering. That word should now be heard, and answered to as never before.

Arise, then, Christian women of this day! Arise, all women who have hearts, Whether your baptism be that of water or of tears! Say firmly : We will not have great questions decided by irrelevant agencies. Our husbands shall not come to us, reeking with carnage, for caresses and applause. Our sons shall not be taken from us to unlearn all that we have been able to teach them of charity, mercy and patience. We, women of one country, will be too tender of those of another country, to allow our sons to be trained to injure theirs. From the bosom of the devastated earth a voice goes up with our own. It says: Disarm, disarm! The sword of murder is not the balance of justice. Blood does not wipe out dishonor, nor violence vindicate possession. As men have often forsaken the plough and the anvil at the summons of war, let women now leave all that may be left of home for a great and earnest day of council.

Let them meet first, as women, to bewail and commemorate the dead. Let them then solemnly take council with each other as to the means whereby the great human family can live in peace, man as the brother of man, each bearing after his own kind the sacred impress, not of Caesar, but of God.

In the name of womanhood and of humanity, I earnestly ask that a general congress of women, without limit of nationality, may be appointed and held at some place deemed most convenient, and at the earliest period consistent with its objects, to promote the alliance of the different nationalities, the amicable settlement of international questions, the great and general interests of peace.

Emily displays her independence in a battle with the Rainbow Snake:

Sleepiest Slow Mo Cat (5/9/15)

Weekends are a great time to rest. Emily verges on the territory of "professional rester." She can sleep almost anywhere, though soft and fluffy places are vastly preferred. She can also rest at anytime of the day or night. Emily has been discovered sleeping on chairs at midday, on couches in the middle of the night, and in boxes in the evening. Emily claims not to need any beauty rest making statements like, "I was born this perfect" or "I don't ned to rest to be beautiful, I need to rest so I can be awake later" or "I only sleep when I'm tired, what do you mean beauty rest do you think I'm not already the most beautiful!?!" She has many thoughts on the matter. And it is true, her rest is more about taking some well deserved time for herself after busy stretches of time engaging in energetic feline activities such as "Chasing The Rainbow Snake" or "Running Places." ON the weekends, however, her duties are not as intense and Emily has more time to rest and relax.

When Emily lays her head down, it is serious business. She will often wrap a foot around her face, or her tail around her entire body to ensure that no warmth can escape. She will also almost always find the softest, coziest, warmest spot she can; even if this means curling up in the place certain humans were just sitting. Mischief and careful planning go into every nap time adventure. Today, Emily is a Sleepy Slow Mo Cat!

Sleepy Lady:

Regal Slow Mo Cat (5/8/15)

Of her many talents, the Regal Statuesque Rest Pose, is one of her greatest. With a mere turn of the head and angling of her body she can strike a sphinx-like pose that radiates ancient glory and poised grace. This morning, without even trying, she was in such a position. Taking her spot on the couch, she transformed it into a throne, one made for a cat-queen.

Sitting in state, hearing the plight of her subjects, she reigns supreme. Swept to power on a wave of popular support, she is commonly referred to as the most beautiful ruler in the history of the couch. The thrilling tale of her conquest can be read here. She has remained in power due to her just hand, her commander's mind, and her thoughtful lawmaking. She has preserved peace in her realm and presided over a prosperous time in the kingdom. Long live the queen!!!

Video of Emily being Regal:

The Tidiest Kitty (5/7/15)

When you go on as many adventures as Emily does, you get dirty. It's just a fact. As a result, it is important to make the time to clean up. This is something Emily does every day. Whether on a couch, a chair, an ottoman, or the middle of the floor in the spot where someone was about to walk, she'll make the time to keep herself pristine.

The paws are usually first since they have usually traveled the roughest. Then her sides and back, then her tail. This routine then finishes with a once-over of her head ears and, last but not least, as featured yesterday, her whiskers. These ablutions keep Emily in tip-top shape, ready for whatever challenges the day may pose, and whatever adventures lie in the next mile on the road of life.

Emily cleans up:

Whisker Time!!! (5/6/15)

Emily has found many creative answers to the question, "What time is it!?!" When asked she is as likely to respond, "Time for you to get a watch." as she is, "11:23am." Today, when asked she had one resounding answer: Whisker Time! Feeling her oats and full of fight, Emily was in the mood to display her face-hairs in the early morning light. Stretching her lip muscles and flexing her eyebrows, her whiskers were extended to their full length. An impressive sight indeed.

Emily takes good care of her vibrissae (aka whiskers -- Emily likes the official terms because they are, as she says, "more imposing."), cleaning and preening, not out of vanity, but out of necessity. As the apex predator in her environment she has to maintain all of the tools at her disposal for hunting down and catching intruders. Since she has to put her mystacial vibrissae (aka, lip whiskers -- Emily insists on the latin because it is, "more important sounding and befits my regal bearing.") to work regularly when tracking her prey, she will often pay extra attention to keeping them clean. While she would not answer specific questions about how exactly her vibrissae work, they clearly aid in her predatory endeavors and, the look pretty darn fantastic too!

Emily shows off her vibrissae:

Slow Mo Cat ROAR!!! (5/5/15)

There are many ways to greet the day. Today, Emily did so with a primordial roar that echoed throughout her domain. Lion-like in its intensity and tiger-like in its power, her roar resounded bouncing off of walls, tables, and countertops alike. The ferocity and power of this explosion of feline energy was matched only by the grace with which she executed the roar itself; stretching her head back and opening her mouth wide.

While other were sleeping in and lollygagging about, Emily was doing her cat-business. There is nothing like an early morning roar to help prepare for breakfast, assorted playing/running/looking at things activities, and any and all other adventures that lay in store for a frisky feline. Though she does not roar often, she does so well, which is why today we feature Emily's Slow Mo ROAR!!!

The Roar:

The Queen of Breakfast (5/4/15)

Emily has never been a big eater. She always has her fill, but does not want to feel overstuffed. She snacks throughout the day and when mealtimes come, she is ready to dig in. Being too full has its dangers. If she is sated and drowsy, any miscreant might sneak up and catch her unawares. To ensure that this never happens, Emily has enough to be full and never more.

Today, after patiently waiting for her breakfast, Emily dug in with gusto. Her unsuspecting pate-prey trapped in its bowl was no match for her fang-filled assault. Snapping and gnashing she quickly demolished it and crowned herself Queen of Breakfast, Ruler of the Four Food Groups, and Protector of all Things Culinary. She rules still with none to threaten her crown.

Emily chowing down:

Key Kitty (5/3/15)

Under the cover of darkness, Emily launched an investigation. She had discovered something strange on her table and, curious cat that she is, she immediately began to find out all she could. First using her paws and then involving her jaws, she batted and clawed at the odd metallic objects, only to discover they were...keys!

Using the shadows and the dark to disguise her movements, Emily continued to play with them. Her ability to blend in to the darkness, even with her bright fur, is commendable. Trained in stealth and secrecy, Emily knows how to silently stalk the edges of night. The darkness was so complete that our camera could barely capture her in the act. Rest assured, once she found them, the keys didn't have a chance. When the Slow Mo Cat is on the case, there is nowhere to run and nowhere to hide.

The Key Investigation:

Slow Mo Cat in the Sunshine (5/2/15)

Spring has sprung! At long last, Emily can yet again bask in the warming glow of the sun. This morning she takes up a perch on the window sill where she can not only enjoy the warm rays, but also keep a close eye on the goings on outside. One of Emily's main criteria in choosing a perch has to do with how much she can see from where she sets up shop. In this case, there are three reasons the windowsill is perfect.

1. Sun. It is warm when the sun shines in. Always appreciative of natural warmth (though not hot springs because they are made of water, obviously) Emily relishes the opportunity to soak up some rays.

2. Proximity to the Outdoors. Though she herself no longer ventures into the great outdoors, her love of the natural world and the obvious joy she gets from the gusts of wind that come in through the window have not diminished.

3. Monitoring. From the windowsill, Emily can see and hear all while remaining almost invisible behind the screen. Like a secret agent she prowls, viewing and noting the goings on for future reference. What's not to love!

Also, as if there needed to be another reason, Emily looks great in the sun. It makes her fur sparkle and her face shine.

Emily at the Windowsill:

Comfy Kitty (5/1/15)

Emily is known by many names. Today she added a new one to the list: "Comfy Kitty." As she rested in the sun this morning, she attained this title by achieving a level of relaxation and contentment rarely seen. Even whens he raised her head to yawn, she was clearly still a bundle of relaxation.

How did she achieve this? It is all down to The Blue Blanket. A fuzzy concoction equal parts wool and cloud, it forms the perfect warm, but not stifling, snuggly, but not stifling surface for Emily to stretch out on. With the help of The Blue Blanket, she can attain heights of rest and relaxation only dreamed of by past generations.

Emily all comfy and whatnot:

Tailmageddon 5: A Tail with a Mind of Its Own! (4/30/15)

Emily and her tail have been known to have their differences. Early this morning, while Emily was still in a deep slumber, her tail developed a few radical ideas about what kind of behavior was appropriate during such a time. Curling, twisting, thumping, and leaping, it was as active as Emily was stoically unmoved.

Unlike in pervious interactions, there were no perceptible hos(tail)ities and events did not escalate as they have in the past to the level of an inter(cat)ional incident. After apparently tiring itself out, Emily's tail rejoined the rest of her body in total and complete rest. This rest remained in effect until it was voluntarily broken for a round of pre-breakfast stretching.

Full video of the tail's movements:

Everybody Flap Your Ears! (4/29/15)

While at rest today, Emily felt something tickling the sensitive hairs inside her ear. It is unknown if it was an errant bit of dust, a sudden wind, or one of her own hairs that perpetrated the intrusion. Whatever it was, Emily knew she was more than a match for its nefarious plans. She didn't even need to deploy her paws to deal with the unexpected intruder. Deftly flicking her ear, she artfully dislodged whatever had caused her the momentary discomfort and continued resting as though nothing had happened. The moral of the story is: If something gets in your ear, rather than totally freaking out about it and being all like, "OH MY GOD THERE IS SOMETHING IN MY EAR GET IT OUT GET IT OUT LIFE WILL NEVER BE THE SAME I AM SO INCONVENIENCED AAAAHHHHHHH" maybe just flap your ear and it will take care of everything. There is probably a larger lesson about life in there, but I'll leave that for you to find.

Ear Flap:

Technicolor Cleanliness (4/28/15)

Emily is rejoicing in the conclusion of her foray into the shady world of noir. Unleashed and back to her usual technicolor ways she decided to celebrate by taking some time out of her busy feline schedule to wash her face and "hands." Deciding to make an occasion of it, she put together the three main elements that make any face/hand washing experience ideal:

First, she identified a soft place to curl up. This was easy. A fuzzy blue blanket is all you need and she found one fast. Second, she made sure that she didn't just sit anywhere on the blanket, but found a spot in the sun. Warm sun is an essential element to the ideal cleaning session. And third, she made sure that this was a warm sunny spot that wasn't going anywhere so that when she was done with her cleaning, she could curl up and go straight to sleep. Mobile spots (laps, piles of laundry etc.) comfy as they may be, carry the unfortunate side effect of being impermanent. With the three elements in place, Emily got to work.

Full video of Emily's return to technicolor:

Noir Cat 7: The Showdown at Sunrise (4/27/15)

Noir week comes to a close a little more than a week after it began. Today, the thrilling conclusion of Emily's investigation! We will return to regular Slow Mo Cat posting tomorrow. To catch up on the previous installments of Noir Cat, here are all the links you need:

Part 1: Trouble in the Night
Part 2: The Screams of the City
Part 3: Shadows in the Dark
Part 4: Gleam in the Gutter
Part 5: The Dark Night, and the Cold Ground
Part 6: The Deal at Dawn

Noir Cat 7: The Showdown at Sunrise

Continued...

James stopped the car outside of a small warehouse with several broken windows, tarnished brickwork and a sign that warned "No Trespassing." James and I got out of the car and as we did, I heard a voice call out, "That's far enough!"

I heard the cold click of a gun being cocked. I looked up. The early morning sky was grey; the clouds from the night before barely shot through with the rays of a low hanging, wintery sun. My eyes wandered over the facade of the building. Then I saw it. The tip of a long-barreled gun, and a glinting eye behind it. I could see the vague outline of a man, a shadow just darker than the blackness behind him. I heard three more clicks and saw more gun barrels appear.

I didn't move a muscle. I didn't even tense. I knew one move and they would shoot just to see me die. I opened my mouth to say something, but the voice spoke again: "I'm sending someone out to say hello. You don't move, and you don't speak until they check you out."

I remained still, showing no sign of fear. I wanted to glance at James. Somehow I hadn't thought to ask him what was going to happen once we got here or what else he knew about this gang and its leader.

After what felt like an hour but was probably only a few seconds, the rusted metal door to the warehouse opened and a familiar thin face appeared. He strode toward us quickly and, when he reached us, patted down James, looked at me and, seeing that I couldn't very well be hiding anything in my fur, motioned for us to go into the building. James started as if to enter, but I decided enough was enough.

"We're alright out here. You've got all your guys with guns to keep you safe, come on out and deal George."

I kept my eyes trained on the window where the gun and the shadow where sitting. I saw the barrel twitch. I hoped it wasn't his finger tightening on the trigger. After a pause, the voice said, "Alright."

Another wait, and the scarred man came striding out the door and I got my first real look at George Gracious. I would find out later that George Gracious was not his real name. His parents were from somewhere in Europe originally. They were very poor and, when they realized that they were going to have a baby, decided it was time to make a fresh start in the new world. George's father worked every job he could find and, as soon as they had the money for boat fare, they made the voyage. George was born in the Atlantic ocean, mid-way between London and New York and given the name Alexander Krynganofski. He grew up poor and ashamed.

The story goes that as soon as he learned how to add in first grade, he was finding creative ways to make money. From schoolyard shakedowns to racetrack shenanigans, the Krynganofski kid was known throughout the neighborhood as a tough young guy with a head on his shoulders and a savvy nose for a good score. Then he vanished. Five years later, he came back. He was taller, fitter, well-dressed, and he wanted to be called George Gracious. He soon got together a small organization and, within a year, was one of the major crime bosses in the city. It was in the middle of that year, during his heady ascent, that James and I crossed his path at a warehouse that was soon to be known (and feared) throughout the city.

When he first appeared, I was struck by how tall he was. His pinstriped suit was clearly well made. Spotless from head to toe, his clothes gave off the air of a floor too good to walk on, or a lawn to perfect for walking. They shouldn't be worn, at least not by the man inside them.

He walked up to us without saying a word. He stared at James for a full thirty seconds before bending down to look at me. I know I'm not an imposing figure. I stand at 2ft nothing on my good days. But George Gracious made the mistake of looking me in the eyes. Ever since I was young, people have been telling me about my eyes. They are a little large and very green and I have always know now to use them. I can stare down anyone and anything. When George Gracious tried to give me the intimidation treatment, I just stared back at him. I could see he was unnerved. I don't think he'd had anyone do that for a little while.

"I think I have something of yours." I said, breaking the building silence. With that, I dropped the cufflink at his feet. Make him bend down and reach for it if he wanted it back. He did bend down and pick it up. As he did I saw a flash on his wrist and saw the cufflink's twin. He hadn't changed everything since the night before. Realizing his shirt might have been exposed when he reached down, he quickly covered his wrist with his other hand. No sooner had he inspected the cufflink than, to my surprise, he dropped it again.

"Never seen it before in my life."

With that, he turned on his heel, and, with his thin faced man following, they went back into the warehouse. There was the soft "click, click, click" as the gun barrels were taken back from the windows. The door slammed behind George and his henchman, and James and I were left standing in the early morning light with more questions than answers. The sunrise was hidden by the clouds and the grey cloak of dawn hung over the city. The leafless trees skeletal fingers rattled against the cold sky, and the broken hulk of the warehouse loomed like a concrete monster poised to swallow us whole. The night had gone.

As James and I drove back through the city, my mind turned to the woman in white. I knew I hadn't imagined her. One more lost lady in a city like this isn't something to get mushy over, but she stuck with me. I pushed her out of my mind. Sometimes it's best to let sleeping secrets stay hidden in the smoke and steam. Cities know how to bury their bodies. I got back to my apartment and found the super repairing my door. While he finished up, I cleaned. By the time he was done, I was ready for bed. So I curled up next to the window and, looking out over the skyline, finally went to sleep.

The End

Emily washes off the grime of the case:

GAME OF THRONES!!! (4/26/15)

Noir week (see below) will conclude tomorrow, but we had to take a break tonight to acknowledge that GAME OF THRONES is coming back for the 3rd episode of season 5. Emily, yet again drawn to one of her favorite characters, who made an appearance in last week's episode: Drogon the Dragon. Here again, she shows that she has not only the will, but also the fangs to be a fire-breathing dragon. She is only missing the fire, and the scales. Also the wings. And she is smaller than Drogon and (if the histories of Westeros are to be believed) basically all of the dragons ever except maybe some of the last ones who were totally effed up b/c of years of Targaryen mistreatment. Anyway, Emily flies high as Drogon once again!

Tune in tomorrow for the thrilling conclusion of Noir Week! To catch up on Emily's investigation, see the previous installments:

Part 1: Trouble in the Night
Part 2: The Screams of the City
Part 3: Shadows in the Dark
Part 4: Gleam in the Gutter
Part 5: The Dark Night, and the Cold Ground
Part 6: The Deal at Dawn

Emily as Drogon:

Noir Cat 6: The Deal at Dawn (4/25/15)

Welcome to Noir Week on My Slow Mo Cat! This week, we have one story told in six parts with accompanying Slow Mo Videos, of course. This is the sixth part of Emily's account of a recent investigation she took part in.

Part 1: Trouble in the Night
Part 2: The Screams of the City
Part 3: Shadows in the Dark
Part 4: Gleam in the Gutter
Part 5: The Dark Night, and the Cold Ground

Part 6: The Deal at Dawn

As the two men made their way slowly down the street, I watched. They looked this way and that and then turning towards #10 and looking at the ground they approached. I ducked below the window frame. They couldn't be following my footsteps could they? Surely the street was still wet enough to disguise my prints. As their sounds of their shuffling feet drew nearer, I realized I didn't know what to do about Nancy and James if the two men tried to enter the house.

As i crouched worrying, the light from the street was suddenly obscured. I could see the outline of two tall, dark hat-wearing shadows. The wavered there in the yellow light before finally turning away. I waited a full minute before daring to peek over the window sill. Nothing. I breathed the tiniest sigh of relief. With most of the night gone I tried to get as much sleep as possible.

Barely three hours later I was up. Nancy and James are early risers. I could hear them upstairs, their voices filtering down. I figured Nancy was telling James I was here. Sure enough when they came down they were together. I hopped down from my spot under the window and joined them in the kitchen. After a few pleasantries, I dove right in. I told them all about my night and how I'd ended up on their doorstep.

James looked at me when I'd finished recounting the story of the night. "Let me see that cufflink." was all he said. I nudged it to him with my paw. He looked at it for a long time, turning it over in his hands. He looked from the cufflink to me and then back to the cufflink as if asking me "are you serious?"

Finally, he spoke. "I think I know where we can find this little guy's owner." As nonplussed as Nancy had been the night before when I turned up, her expression was nothing to mine when I heard him say that. He continued, "This GG, it's the mark of a new gang in town. Their leader is a man named George Gracious. He matches the description of the scarred man you were talking about. Their headquarters isn't far from here. If you're up to it, we could go over there and see what we can find?"

"Absolutely!" I leapt from my seat and, with James in tow, headed straight out the door.

It became clear after we had been driving for awhile, that by "their headquarters is near here" what James had meant is, "their headquarters is in the same state." We drove for almost half an hour in James' old, half-broken car. I stood with my hind paws on the passenger seat and my front paws propped on the door so I could easily look out the window.

James stopped the car outside of a small warehouse with several broken windows, tarnished brickwork and a sign that warned "No Trespassing." James and I got out of the car and as we did, I heard a voice call out...

To be continued...

Emily never stops working on the case:

Noir Cat 5: The Dark Night, and the Cold Ground (4/24/15)

Welcome to Noir Week on My Slow Mo Cat! We are taking a break from the usual Fast Friday posting to finish up our extended report on Emily's investigation. This week, we have one story told in six parts with accompanying Slow Mo Videos, of course. This is the fifth part of Emily's account of a recent investigation she took part in.

Part 1: Trouble in the Night
Part 2: The Screams of the City
Part 3: Shadows in the Dark
Part 4: Gleam in the Gutter

Part 5: The Dark Night, and the Cold Ground
Continued...

I grabbed the cufflink and headed for the window. As I leapt out, I heard the door splinter and a man's grunt. I turned around just in time to see the same man with the scarred face who I had glimpsed from afar earlier. I didn't pause to try and see any more of the man, or get a look at his companion. I was out the window, down the fire escape and off across the street before either man had fully entered my apartment.

I didn't even know what time it was. The moon was out and there were still stars in the sky. It had to be late. It felt like I'd been trying to get to sleep for hours. I looked up and saw the clock face over Curt's Deli. Just after 2. I knew I had to keep moving. There was one place I could go, no matter the hour.

After 10 minutes of running, I was out of breath, and in front of a familiar black wood door. The iron 10 in the center of the door was put there only a year or so ago. It was already rusted. I pawed with my claws lightly extended at the bottom of the door. It was the closest I could get to knocking. I hadn't seen either of the men chasing me, but I wanted to get in as fast as I could. During my run, clouds had covered the moon and most of the stars making the night darker than ever before. The streetlights fought as best they could, but there was only so much their municipal bulbs could do. The ground, wet from the rain earlier, was not helping my mood.

Finally, the door swung open. It revealed a short woman, gaunt and pale wearing a tattered shawl. She looked up and down the street before bringing her eyes down and noticing me with a start.

"Nancy." I said.

"Emily!" the surprise was still evident in her voice.

"May I come in?"

"Of course." I could see she was still wondering why I was there. Her eyes were wider than usual and her brows were arched quizzically.

"Thanks. I just need to stay 'til the morning."

"What? Uh...alright." Nancy was still nonplussed. I trotted past her letting her stew in her befuddlement. I'd never had much use for her. She was nice enough, but not the quickest of wits.

"Is James home?" I asked.

"Yes, he's asleep upstairs." Nancy sounded a little wary as though I was going to ask her to go wake him up. If I'm honest, the thought crossed my mind. I decided it could wait until morning. Instead I said a quick goodnight to Nancy and installed myself near one of the front windows. I watched the street straining my eyes against the darkness, willing myself to see a little farther. Squinting into the night, I saw rounding the corner the two men from before. The one with the scarred face was in the lead and behind him, his face revealed for the first time, was the other man. His face was thin and unlined; young. A tuft of dark hair escaped from under his hat-brim and, though the collar of his raincoat was turned up, I could still see his piercing eyes and pointed nose clearly.

As the two men made their way slowly down the street, I watched. They looked this way and that and then turning towards #10...

To be continued...

Emily cogitates on the case:

Noir Cat 4: A Gleam in the Gutter (4/23/15)

Welcome to Noir Week on My Slow Mo Cat! This week, we have one story told in six parts with accompanying Slow Mo Videos, of course. This is Emily's account of a recent investigation she took part in.

Part 1: Trouble in the Night
Part 2: The Screams of the City
Part 3: Shadows in the Dark

Part 4: Gleam in the Gutter
Continued...

As I turned the corner a gleam in the gutter caught my eye. I looked over and there shining was something small. I trotted over and leaned down. A cufflink. On it, in glittering gemstones, GG. Initials? Something more? I briefly considered calling for Bradford. Nah, he would just slow me down.

I could see still the faint outline of where the men's car must have been parked. The rain was still drizzling, but there was an obvious rectangle that didn't shine like the rest of the pavement. Looking around the edges, I couldn't see anything else that would indicate where the men had gone. Wet and tired I turned back, heading to my clean, dry bed. Bradford and the other cop were still chatting idly by the lamppost. They glared in my direction as I passed. I nodded a quick goodnight. Bradford said something else about wanting a statement from me, but I wasn't listening. Anyway, I could tell his heart wasn't in it. With no evidence anything had happened, he didn't want to fill out the paperwork. He could say it was some crackpot with a false alarm.

I dried myself off as best I could and curled up to go to sleep. Normally I'm a champion sleeper, but tonight, I couldn't shut my eyes without seeing the imprint of the woman in white. In the quiet I could still hear her screams. Staring at the shadows I counted the number of cars that turned my corner. Whenever they did, their lights would briefly flash on the walls. On the top of the bookshelf next to my bed sat the cufflink. I stared at it too. I wondered which of the two men it had belonged to. I knew it could have been dropped by someone passing by earlier in the day, but the people around here don't wear cufflinks. Hell, the clothes they usually wear don't have cuffs at all.

I must have drifted of eventually b/c the next thing I knew I heard a sharp knocking on my door. No, not a knocking, a battering, crashing. I knew in an instant: someone was trying to knock the door down. I didn't want to stick around and find out what was coming through. I grabbed the cufflink and headed for the window. As I leapt out, I heard the door splinter and a man's grunt. I turned around just in time to see...

To be continued....

Emily's work is never done, but sometimes rest is needed:

Noir Cat 3: Shadows in the Dark (4/22/15)

Welcome to Noir Week on My Slow Mo Cat! This week, we have one story told in six parts with accompanying Slow Mo Videos, of course. This is Emily's account of a recent investigation she took part in.

Part 1: Trouble in the Night
Part 2: The Screams of the City

Part 3: Shadows in the Dark
Continued...

Detective Bradford turned to me and said, "What gives?"

I looked up and down the street before answering. If there was any trace of the woman, I wanted to show him. It had taken Bradford, and the rest of the police for that matter, awhile to get used to the idea of a cat detective. They got they started warming up to me after when I helped solve the Lattimore Jewel heist. I didn't want to take any chances.

"She was right here." I shot back. I didn't blink.

"Well, what do you figure, she just up and vanished?" Bradford had a tone in his voice I didn't like. Sarcastic. Teasing.

"Look, all I know is she was here last I knew." I was done with his attitude.

Bradford turned away from me and looked at the man with him they both glanced at the ground. After a cursory look at the lamppost, Bradford looked back around. "I don't think you'd yank our chain on purpose, but are you sure you saw something? There's no marks out here, nothing to show anyone has been here recently. Maybe in the dark you didn't see?"

"I'm a cat." I said. I kept my voice level and my eyes fixed on Bradford. "I know what I saw, dark or otherwise."

With that I turned and made my way up the street in the direction the men in raincoats had run. "Hey! Come back here. We need a statement." Bradford was yelling now. Always so quick to yell. I just keep walking. Let him stretch his legs a little if he wanted to get anything out of me. God knows he needs the exercise.

As I turned the corner a gleam in the gutter caught my eye. I looked over and there shining was...

To be continued....

Emily continues to ponder the case:

Noir Cat 2: The Screams of the City (4/21/15)

Welcome to Noir Week on My Slow Mo Cat! This week, we have one story told in six parts with accompanying Slow Mo Videos, of course. This is Emily's account of a recent investigation she took part in.

Part 1: Trouble in the Night

Part 2: The Screams of the City

This city's secrets smolder in its sewers, festering there like putrid outlaws. Looking out the window I saw streets slick with rain, lights glancing off of the pavement. A dog was howling in the distance. I looked this way and that for the screamer. All along the street dark doorways lined the brick buildings and a pulsating neon sign cast an eerie glow at the far end of the block.

Just as I was about to turn away, two men in dark raincoats came running from one of the doorways. They wore hats, and I could hear the click click of their shoes as they hurried away. Their shadows chased them as they ran. Before they turned onto one of the side streets, I caught a glimpse of the taller one's face. It was lined and ragged with a scar extending from the corner of his left eye almost all the way to the bottom of his chin. His lip was curled in a perpetual snarl that exposed several of his teeth. They looked yellow, but I couldn't tell if that was the streetlight's doing or his.

A few seconds after they turned the corner, I heard the clunk clunk ROAR of a car engine starting and the screech of tires on slick pavement. Another decision to make. Should I turn from the window and go back to bed, or venture out into the night? Suddenly, more movement. From the doorway, a woman came staggering. She wore only a white nightgown. As she stumbled into the light I could see there was blood on it and it had been ripped in several places. She came to the light post, clutched at it weakly, and then, shuddering and gasping, sank to the ground.

I turned from the window quickly and dialed the police. They have been good about taking my calls since I got my license. Though I've mostly been just south of strictly law abiding, I've given them a few tips that have paid off. Officer Jankowitz was on duty and he said a car would be on its way soon. He advised me to stay put, but I knew as soon as I put down the receiver, I'd be out the door. Even before I put down the phone, I could hear a siren. There must have been a car on duty nearby. The keening screech grew louder and louder. The lights flashed through my windows and across the walls as I turned to leave. Racing out the door I saw Detective Bradford and another man I didn't know standing by the lamppost. I raced over as fast as I could.  There was nothing. The woman was gone. Detective Bradford and the other man turned to look at me. Detective Bradford said, ...

To be continued...

Emily ponders the case:

Noir Cat 1: Trouble in the Night (4/20/15)

Welcome to Noir Week on My Slow Mo Cat! This week, we have one story told in six parts with accompanying Slow Mo Videos, of course.

Part 1: Trouble in the Night

I had just finished my dinner at the Floor Top Diner and was settling in for the night, when I heard someone or something let out a scream. That's not unusual. This city has its fair share of screamers, and my hearing is better than most. It had been a long time since I'd heard someone make a noise like this though. Who ever was in trouble could let one loose like the winds of winter's banshee mother. Part of me wanted to go back home and lie down, but the other part of me knew that wasn't an option.

I'm Emily by the way, Emily D. D stands for Dickinson, but in these parts a name like that will only get you rough stares. I keep to myself mostly, don't need much else. Got a license a couple weeks ago to be a P.I. It's been alright so far. The usual collection of lowlifes and grifters have come through my office. Most just want me to rough someone up for them. I'll do it if the price is right, but I don't like it. I've been itching to make a difference, you know. Find a case where I'm working for something, not just running back and forth dancing to the tune of fortune's calypso strings. Something in that scream let me know this might be my chance. So I headed over the the closest window and looked around.

To be continued...

Full video:

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT: My Slow Mo (Noir) Cat (4/19/15)

Now that we have bid farewell to Game of Thrones week, Emily is on to her next challenge. Having caught the acting bug last week, she wanted to continue to stretch her abilities. After a viewing of Mildred Pierce, she knew what she wanted to do next: noir.

Bring on the low-key lighting, the femme fatales, the private eyes, the morally ambiguous situations and the (nearly) unsolvable cases. For the next week, we will tell one story in six daily installments. But how is My Slow Mo (Noir) Cat different than the regular My Slow Mo Cat, you ask? Well, first of all, great question. Let's explore! 1) All photos and videos will be in black and white 2) The writing that accompanies each video will tell an ongoing story of Emily's noir adventure. Consider today's offering, a clue to the case to come, and an indication of what style we will be adopting in the coming days.

Tune in every day for a new part of the case/story!!!

First taste of My Slow Mo (NOIR) Cat:

Khaleesi/Danerys Targaryen (4/18/15)

It's the seventh (and final) day of Game of Thrones week here on My Slow Mo Cat! Every day this week, in honor of the premier of the 5th season of Game of Thrones, Emily (aka the Slow Mo Cat) is impersonating a different Game of Thrones character.

Day 1: Drogon
Day 2: Jamie Lannister aka The Kingslayer
Day 3: Tyrion Lannister
Day 4: Grand Maester Pycelle
Day 5: Arya Stark
Day 6: A White Walker
Day 7: Khaleesi/Danerys Targaryen

Was there any other way this week could end? Emily, though she did spot on impersonations of the other six Game of Thrones characters, ends this week with the one nearest to herself: The Mother of Dragons herself, Danerys Targaryen. Regal and stately with a burning intensity to her, and a will to change the world for the better, Emily and Dany have much in common. Rather than recreate a specific scene as she did with the other characters, Emily chose to simply embody the grace and danger that Dany projects. When looking at Emily sitting on the couch/Iron Throne, one can easily imagine that dragons swirl about her head while a horde of Unsullied await her command. A fitting finale to Game of Thrones week!!!

Emily is Danerys Targaryen, the Mother of Dragons!

White Walker (4/17/15)

It's the sixth day of Game of Thrones week here on My Slow Mo Cat and we are taking a break from the usual Fast Friday posting to finish up our work in Westeros. Every day this week, in honor of the premier of the 5th season of Game of Thrones, Emily (aka the Slow Mo Cat) is impersonating a different Game of Thrones character.

Day 1: Drogon
Day 2: Jamie Lannister aka The Kingslayer
Day 3: Tyrion Lannister
Day 4: Grand Maester Pycelle
Day 5: Arya Stark
Day 6: A White Walker

Emily decides to stretch her acting abilities to the limits. After a quasi-restive impersonation of Arya Stark, Emily decided that she would try her paw at a more challenging role: A White Walker. Of all the characters in Game of Thrones, there are non less like Emily than these fearsome ice-zombies. Where she is covered in fur, they are covered in some kind of creepy ice-skin. Where she is warm and full of love, their cold hearts were given over to the snow lands long ago. Where she lives south of The Wall, they live north of the wall. Where she is totally find with letting humans inhabit Westeros, they are not sold on the proposition and, when winter comes, they will most likely obliterate all in their path, unless some dragon queen from across The Narrow Sea comes over and breathes fire all over their pale white patoots...or something. Just sayin'.

Emily decided that, for her White Walker scene, she had to incorporate "The Screech" and felt the best way to capture that was to show how a White Walker would react to someone scratching it on the head. The answer: with annoyance. She captures the icy spirit of these mysterious beings as well as their viciousness.

Full White Walker Impersonation:

Arya Stark (4/16/15)

Welcome to the fifth day of Game of Thrones week here on My Slow Mo Cat. Every day this week, in honor of the premier of the 5th season of Game of Thrones, Emily (aka the Slow Mo Cat) is impersonating a different Game of Thrones character.

Day 1: Drogon
Day 2: Jamie Lannister aka The Kingslayer
Day 3: Tyrion Lannister
Day 4: Grand Maester Pycelle
Day 5: Arya Stark

Emily shows she has what it takes to waterdance like everyone's favorite little assassin. Again with the help of The Rainbow Snake, she shows what it would be like if Arya was attacked by one of Danerys' dragons, and how Arya would defend. With grace and agility, she dodges the first fire-blast, and uses needle to get between the beasts scales. Truly a battle to remember.

Emily as Arya:

Grand Maester Pycelle (4/15/15)

Welcome to the fourth day of Game of Thrones week here on My Slow Mo Cat. Every day this week, in honor of the premier of the 5th season of Game of Thrones, Emily (aka the Slow Mo Cat) is impersonating a different Game of Thrones character.

Day 1: Drogon
Day 2: Jamie Lannister aka The Kingslayer
Day 3: Tyrion Lannister
Day 4: Grand Maester Pycelle

Emily has sharpened her talents as an actor this last week. After three days of impersonating vibrant characters much like herself, she decided to try being like a character who is nothing like her: Grand Maester Pycelle. In GoT he is almost a character within a character; virile and surprisingly fit for his age, but affecting a hunched, doddering demeanor to conceal his true abilities, mental and physical. Emily, for her part, is a 14 year old cat who defies her age day in and day out with feats of physical prowess cats half her age would be thrilled to accomplish.

To fully embody Pycelle she chose to reenact the scene where, after pretending to be a complete old ninny to Roz, we see Pycelle pacing in his chambers preparing for the day only to slump once again before exiting. She does "the slump" hunching over and curling up in a bundle.

Pycelle Impersonation:

Tyrion Lannister (4/14/15)

Welcome to the third day of Game of Thrones week here on My Slow Mo Cat. Every day this week, in honor of the premier of the 5th season of Game of Thrones, Emily (aka the Slow Mo Cat) is impersonating a different Game of Thrones character.

Day 1: Drogon
Day 2: Jamie Lannister aka The Kingslayer
Day 3: Tyrion Lannister

Before Sunday's season premier, we had last seen Tyrion in full flight, allowing himself to be locked in a crate so he could escape from the certain death that awaited him in Westeros. Emily, was at first unsure if she could even pull off a Tyrion impersonation. How could she embody all those character complexities? Wouldn't her performance be compared to that of Peter Dinklage? After quite a bit of cajoling, I convinced her to give it a shot and boy did she do great!

For Tyrion, Emily chose to reenact the scene where he emerges from his crate after a long journey from King's Landing to Pentos. Embodying all of the curiosity and cleverness of Tyrion, under the cover of night, Emily pokes her head out of the box/crate and surveys her new life.

Jamie Lannister/The Kingslayer (4/13/15)

Welcome to Game of Thrones week on My Slow Mo Cat. Every day this week, in honor of the premier of the 5th season of Game of Thrones, Emily (aka the Slow Mo Cat) is impersonating a different Game of Thrones character.

Day 1: Drogon
Day 2: Jamie Lannister aka The Kingslayer

When Emily fights, it is always fair and square and on the up and up. For this Game of Thrones impersonation, Emily enlisted the (grudging) assistance of her sparring partner, The Rainbow Snake. To accurately recreate the scene in the Throne Room where Jamie slays The Mad King, Emily/Jamie perched herself/himself high upon the sofa staring out, from a window in the Red Keep looking over the city that the Mad King/The Rainbow Snake wanted to burn. Behind her The Mad King/The Rainbow Snake slinks away after having told her/him not only of his plan to kill everyone in King's Landing, but also giving her/him the command to kill Tywin, her father. Emily/Jamie, after thinking over her/his desperate situation turns and, noticing that the Mad King/The Rainbow Snake's back is turned, leaps and does away with the crazed ruler. As Emily and The Rainbow Snake tussle, if you squint your eyes just a little, the couch and other accouterments of modern life slip away and you will find yourself transported to Westeros; where steel, stone, fire and ice rule.

Emily's Kingslayer Impersonation (with help from The Rainbow Snake):

Drogon the Dragon (4/12/15)

It's Game of Thrones week here on My Slow Mo Cat. Every day we will see Emily doing her best impressions of various Game of Thrones characters. To start it off, Emily takes a crack at embodying the spirit of the deadliest (living) dragon in the seven kingdoms: Drogon.

Displaying her ferocity and her fangs, Emily opens wide her gaping maw. When her mouth is at full stretch, it is not hard to imagine flames shooting from it, melting stone, bones, and all else. Harkening back to that primordial time when reptiles and mammals shared a common ancestor, Emily searches deep in her genetic code for the link to that many-scaled creature. With the heat of potential flames in her veins, and the will to rain fire down upon her enemies, she is truly a cat-dragon greater and more fearsome than all others. She. Is. Drogon!

Full video of her Drogon Impersonation: